Who Are You, Really?
It can be too easy for us to live our life based off of labels.
We often show up to our lives directed by external circumstances and expectations. We are not taught to live in the present. We are taught to dictate our actions to reflect the past or anticipate the future, instead of checking in with what feels right in each present moment. We do not ask our present self what is needed. We can live as if life is scripted, as if we are playing a part and we have to show up and act accordingly.
I am a ___ so I have to act in this way. I do ___ therefore that is who I am. They expect me to act this way because I am a ___.
Labels and identities can be a really beautiful way to form connections and develop a sense of self. However, they do not represent our fullest truest selves. This may sound a little “woo-woo” but truthfully, at our core, we are not limited to any of these labels. Our attachment to these identities can cause us so much suffering and stagnancy. Removing this attachment can bring about freedom and growth. It can be dangerous to base your whole sense of self around a certain identity, because that can be taken from you. When we are able to detach ourselves from the external, we realise we are okay without it. We are able to see that nothing can take away the truth of who we are. Whether we fail or succeed, win the race or go bankrupt… there is an essence within us that is always whole and unchanging.
I find it really powerful to practice separating myself from a situation and seeing it as if from a bird’s eye view. Watching yourself in a situation as if you are an outsider looking in allows you a new perspective. You can then see what outside influences may be impacting your actions and decisions and you can reassess from a neutral place.
One way to practice this is through meditations, either guided or on your own. Mindfulness practices such as meditation can help strengthen your ability to remove yourself from the labels.
You can start with a situation that feels particularly activating for you. Allow yourself the space to sit quietly and visualise yourself floating above the scene. As you watch it unfold, notice what may be influencing your actions. Are your actions being dictated by a version of yourself you think you need to be? Are you acting in response to past experiences or what you think will happen in the future? Is there a way that you can respond differently that better represents what you need right now? Allow yourself to simply observe and notice, maybe journaling on what comes up for you.
What is a label you base your identity on? Who would you be if you removed your attachment to this label? How would you act? How would you feel? How would you show up for your life?
Our lives can change when we realise we are not always who we think we are and there is no one we need to be.
If you would like more insight or guidance on navigating these guided meditations or journal inquiries, don’t hesitate to reach out!
